Dating In College: Effects of Social Media Pt.3

Good morning, guys. 

I was talking with a friend, and something clicked for me: Relationships don't work nowadays because everyone is so stuck on being confined in a box, i.e, a label. 

An example of this is people being in "talking stages". Sometimes I feel as if people are so focused on being in that stage to the point where they end up falling out. Yes, there are a plethora of reasons why two people can fall out during this time, but putting a time limit or a strict label on yourselves creates a sort of expectation that sometimes cannot always be achieved. This can cause an immense amount of stress- and as someone who has experienced this multiple times, it's not fun. At all. 

Clearly, this is an effect of social media consumption. Over consumption, even. 

I said this previously- sure that term could have existed in the past, but it does not hold the same amount of weight in modern times. 

I want people to understand that you are DATING. That's what it is, that's what it means. You are learning and going out with a person to (hopefully) get into a relationship with them. There are different forms of this, too. It's not as limiting as the term "talking stage" is. In my opinion, at least. 

Another point I want to bring up is that this issue seems to be mainly a concern within the black community. We are so focused on the next best thing, labels, comparing ourselves to our people, which we then question why it's so hard to date nowadays.

This can easily be fixed, though. Focus on yourself. Focus on what you have and not what the next person has. Don't be so quick to label yourselves because again, you're setting unattainable expectations on your relationship.  

You may not agree with me, and that is okay. However, this is a mindset that I want to have for myself to prevent unnecessary stress. Dating should be enjoyable, not unbearable. 

On a more personal note, I often discuss the stages of talking (and down on them) because this is what I tend to constantly find myself in. As time passes, I realize that small things like this prevent relationships from fully flourishing. Now, obviously, I and said people did not see eye to eye, but I digress.

I hope that this new year brings new, beautiful, and genuine relationships for both you and me. If that's what you want, of course. Be okay with what you have- especially if you are super into that person and see a future with them. Don't stress yourself out over limits that people have randomly come up with on the internet. Dating a person can last 2 weeks, a month, or even 3 or more, and that is okay. Your intent and how you approach the relationship are some of the most important aspects. 

Enjoy your holidayz, I'll see you next year.